Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
