SEEEEXXX PLEASE
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
