I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
