So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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