And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
