So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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