it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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