we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We were destined to go to rehab together
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
