Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I just had sex on a roof
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
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