I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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