guys are not supposed to queef...right?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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