your room smells of hookers.
And success
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
