So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
