i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
My life is pants optional.
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