Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
