I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i jhust puked up my retainher.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
