I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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