I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize