I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
