I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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