the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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