Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
And then the night went full on bisexual.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
