The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
