It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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