I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
