Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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