I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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