I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
