road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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