just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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