Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I need water and some morals
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
