Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
There are leaves in my underwear?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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