New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize
