My brain says no but my pants say off.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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