omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
