Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
