So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
