So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
