Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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