Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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