It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
