it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
You've changed since you got that strap on
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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