You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
