she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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