There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize