you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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