Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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