Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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