you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
