I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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