At least make sure they are 18
Why
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
