I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
